Top 10 Signs Your Life Is Too Similar To David Letterman's

10 - Your wife says she's never loved anyone like she loves you. For less than $600.

9 - You get home from work and find your wife in bed with another talk show host, and she claims he was just pre-screening her for an upcoming event.

8 - Your mailman knows where you keep your condoms.

7 - Seeing an older woman dressed like a slut brings back memories of home when your were a child.

6 - Your son wants a dress for Christmas.

5 - Your son gets kicked out of school for groping his teacher. And the teacher says he doesn't tolerate this kind of behavior; unless he gets taken out to dinner first.

4 - Your son says he want to get married when he's forty. As soon as he graduates High School.

3 - You didn't realize how much your son looked like you until your wife took him to the zoo and zoo officials tried to lure him into a cage with a banana.

2 - You never take your wife out in public, so people start asking if you cover her face when you're having sex.

1 - You don't socialize much because you're afraid people might find out that the act you've been putting on about being a loser is not an act.

God bless Alaska Governor Sarah Palin! The best candidate for just about any position in America. May she win the next Presidential election. It would be a sin if she didn't run. After Barak Obama gets through with this country, Americans will run in droves to vote for Plain; Democrats, Republicans, Independents, co-dependents, non-dependents, you name it!